Category Archives: Fights and feuds

1662: Maryland magistrate dumped for genital slur

Thomas Baker arrived in the colony of Maryland as an indentured servant sometime in the mid-1650s. In 1661, the Maryland governor, Philip Calvert, appointed Baker as magistrate of Charles County. This generated a firestorm of protest. There were questions about Baker’s suitability, as he was of very humble origins, questionable sobriety and very coarse behaviour.

Just how coarse became a matter of public record in 1662 during a series of defamation hearings. Witnesses accused Baker of slandering several men and women, the latter with sexual slurs. He was alleged to have described Mrs Joan Nevill:

“…in so gross a manner that if [the things Baker said were] true… she would not be a creature modest enough to keep the brutals of the forest company.”

Two other witnesses, Richard Roe and William Robisson, testified that Baker had said that:

“…[Francis] Pope’s wife’s c–t was like a shot bag, and Miss Alice Hatch’s c—t would make sauce enough for all the dogs in the town.”

No official sanction or decision against Baker was recorded, however, he never again sat as a magistrate, suggesting the Maryland governor quietly ordered Baker’s removal.

Source: Records of Charles County, Maryland, 1658 and 1662. Content on this page is © Alpha History 2016. Content may not be republished without our express permission. For more information please refer to our Terms of Use or contact Alpha History.

1623: ‘Whip-Her-Arse Dick’ loses libel case

In March 1622, Richard Turner, a gentleman and town councillor from Thaxted in Essex, was seen thrashing his teenage daughter, Anne. According to Turner “she had given just cause of grief and offence” and he was delivering “such correction… as to reform some errors in her”. News of this event soon reached the working classes of Thaxted. Turner, who was unpopular to begin with, quickly became known as ‘Whip-Her-Arse’ Dick. This derogatory nickname was apparently derived from a bawdy song:

“Hurry thee home Anne
Hurry thee home Anne
Whip Her Arse Dick
Whip Her Arse Dick

All those that love puddings
Come unto Parke Street
And learn the song
Of Whip Her Arse Dick.”

There were other verses, including one that compared Turner to an Essex man hanged for murdering his child. According to witness testimony, the lyrics to ‘Whip Her Arse Dick’:

“…become public, common and notorious in the eyes, ears and tongues of Thaxted. [It had been] reported and sung, published and divulged… in diverse inns, alehouses and other places of the said town of Thaxted and the county of Essex. [It had been] taught and instructed to young children to sing the same, to wrong and provoke him.”

Facing the loss of his good name, Turner sued several individuals for libel. The case was heard in 1623 but Turner was unsuccessful. According to anecdotal evidence, ‘Whip-Her-Arse’ Dick was popular with locals for several years. The humiliated Turner became reclusive and suffered financially after neglecting his businesses.

Source: Various, including London Public Record Office, 8/307/9 (1623). Content on this page is © Alpha History 2016. Content may not be republished without our express permission. For more information please refer to our Terms of Use or contact Alpha History.

1690: Oxford student sues for chicken-carving slur

In 1690, the chancellor’s court at Oxford University heard a defamation dispute between two Exeter College students: John Colmer and John Crabbe. According to the plaintiff Colmer and his witnesses, Crabbe had been telling malicious and dishonest stories about Colmer for several weeks.

Colmer produced witnesses to support his claims, including the respected scholar and future Bishop of Peterborough, White Kennett. According to their testimony, most of Crabbe’s “slanderous tales” told of Colmer’s alleged promiscuity and “brutish lust”. One story spread by Crabbe was that Colmer had been present at:

“…a supper with the Earl of Warwick [where] he represented to his Lordship the obscene parts of a woman, by the cutting of such a figure from the flesh of a roasted fowl.”

Crabbe also produced witnesses in his defence, though most were exposed as homeless prostitutes. Unsurprisingly, the chancellor’s court ruled in Colmer’s favour.

Source: Oxford University archives, Chancellor’s Court papers, folio 56, 1690.

1640: Dick Head fined for abusing gentleman

In late 1640, magistrates in Kent heard a charge of defamation submitted by Mr William Culpepper, a “gentleman of good quality and of an ancient family”. According to Culpepper, he had been accosted by Richard Head, who had assailed him with:

“…diverse unmannerly and lewd speeches, calling him rogue and rascal and bidding him kiss his arse, with other saucy and unseemly terms.”

The magistrates found in Culpepper’s favour. Richard Head was fined and ordered to apologise.

Source: Centre for Kentish Studies, Q/SO W1, folio 120. Content on this page is © Alpha History 2016. Content may not be republished without our express permission. For more information please refer to our Terms of Use or contact Alpha History.

1608: Newcastle women brawl over good white bread

The archives in Durham contain witness testimonies of a confrontation between two Newcastle women in 1608. Elizabeth Waister and Alice Fetherstone were both married, both from Ryton and consequently known to each other.

While standing at a bread stall at Newcastle market, Alice accused Elizabeth of jumping the queue and purchasing the last of the “good white bread”. This accusation unleashed a torrent of invective, which included Elizabeth’s claim that Alice was:

“…a slut that did shit in her cooking pot…”

Alice fired back with an even more poisonous barb, referring to a stillborn child Elizabeth had delivered years earlier:

“Thou art a poisoned, jaded whore… God had sent [you] one example [of your whoredom] and perhaps he might send another.”

Elizabeth subsequently sued Alice for defamation but the outcome of this case is not recorded.

Source: Testimony of Alice Fetherstone and others, Durham County Record Office, vol. 3, 1608. Content on this page is © Alpha History 2016. Content may not be republished without our express permission. For more information please refer to our Terms of Use or contact Alpha History.