The Tsarina’s letter to Nicholas II (1915)

In August 1915, Tsarina Alexandra wrote this letter to Nicholas II, as he departed for the Western Front to take command of the army:

“My very own beloved one,

I cannot find words to express all I want to, my heart is far too full. I only long to hold you tight in my arms & whisper words of intense love, courage, strength & endless blessings. More than hard to let you go alone, so completely alone—but God is very near you, more than ever. You have fought this great fight for your country & throne, alone & with bravery & decision. Never have they seen such firmness in you before & it cannot remain without good fruit.

Do not fear for what remains behind: one must be severe & stop all at once. Lovey, I am here, don’t laugh at silly old wifey, but she has trousers on unseen… Whenever I can be of the smallest use, tell me what to do — use me — at such a time God will give me the strength to help you, because our souls are fighting for the right against the evil… we, who have been taught to look at all from the other side, see what the struggle here really is & means. You showing your mastery, proving yourself the Autocrat without who Russia cannot exist.

Had you given in now to these different questions, they would have dragged out yet more of you. Being firm is the only saving. I know what it costs you; [I] have & do suffer hideously for you. Forgive me, I beseech you, my Angel, for having left you no peace & worried you so much — but I too well know your marvellously gentle character; you had to shake it off this time, had to win your fight alone against all. It will be a glorious page in your reign & Russian history, the story of these weeks & days & God, who is just & near you, will save your country & throne through your firmness…

God anointed you at your coronation. He placed you where you stand & you have done your duty. Be sure, quite sure of this & He forsaketh not His anointed. Our Friend’s prayers arise night & day for you to Heaven & God will hear them. Those who fear & cannot understand your actions will be brought by events to realise your great wisdom. It is the beginning of the glory of your reign. He said so & I absolutely believe it. Your Sun is rising & today it shines so brightly. And so will you charm all those great blunderers, cowards, lead astray, noisy, blind, narrow-minded & false beings…

All is for the good, as Our Friend says, the worst is over. Now you speak to the  Minister of war & he will take energetic measures, as soon as needed — but Khvostov, will see to that too if you name him. When you leave, shall wire to Friend tonight through Ania & He will particularly think of you. Only get Nikolasha’s nomination quicker done—no dawdling, its bad for the cause & for Alexejev too & a settled thing quieten minds, even if against their wish, sooner than that waiting & uncertainty & trying to influence you —t tires out one’s heart…

Bitter pain not to be with you — know what you feel, & the meeting with N won’t be agreeable — you did trust him & now you know, what months ago our Friend said, that he was acting wrongly towards you & your country & wife… Near you all is well — when out of sight others at once profit —you see they are afraid of me & so come to you alone [when the Tsarina is not there] — they know I have a will of my own when I feel I am in the right — & you are now — we know it, so you make them tremble before your courage & will.

God is with you & our Friend for you — all is well — & latter all will thank you for having saved your country. Don’t doubt — believe & all will be well & the army is everything — a few strikes nothing, in comparison, as can & shall be suppressed. The left are furious because all slips through their hands…

Now goodnight lovey, go straight to bed without tea with the rest & their long faces. You have Gregory’s St Nicolas to guard & guide you… I clasp you tenderly to my heart, kiss and caress you without end — want to show you all the intense love I have for you, warm, cheer, console, strengthen you, & make you sure of yourself. Sleep well my Sunshine, Russia’s Saviour. Remember last night, how tenderly we clung together? I shall yearn for your caresses, I never can have enough of them. I kiss you without end & bless you. Holy Angels guard your slumber — I am near & with you forever & ever & none shall separate us.”

Your very own wife
Sunny